November 24, 2014

Paris... Je ne te aime pas plus

Oh Paris, how I dreamed of walking your streets, eating your food and sucking up all the inherent coolness your people seem to have. Well, I have to tell you Paris, your food was tres mal except of course for your Crème Brulee and Macaroons. Your streets smelled quite bad and your people were comme ci comme ça.

My husband and I travelled across the channel on the Eurostar. It was my first time travelling to the continent by train and it was wonderful. I didn’t have to faff about with liquids or the weight of my luggage and security took five minutes.

It was really great to get to Paris and to not have to then travel into the city. We arrived smack dab in the middle at Gare du Nord and only had a few metro stops to our hotel in the heart of Montmartre just around the corner from the Moulin Rouge.

It was also right around the corner from the Amelie café where I had been in 2003 with my girl Jess and mistakenly ordered Steak Tartar thinking it would be- well, cooked. We went once for breakfast and had very bad service. The second time we went for afternoon dessert. I had the crème brulee and Billy had the cheese. There were so many tourists coming in and out the entire time. I went to use the bathroom, which was engaged so I looked at a collection of props from the movie. Then I noticed how disgusting the sink was and I decided to hold it and left.

We were only there for one full day and two half days so we tried to fit in as much as possible. We took a boat ride down the Seine and walked along it at the Ile de Cite. The only thing I insisted we queue for was to buy Laduree macaroons. They are seriously the best macaroons- ever! I had them for the first time at the Laduree in Miami’s South Beach earlier this year. MMM.

Inside were gorgeous art deco designs and the queue was out the door and around the block. I got frantic when it was finally my turn and I ordered eight macaroons as they were rather pricey and I knew they wouldn’t last to take back with me. I also bought a little box of chocolate for someone’s Christmas present (I really hope the chocolate is still good by then as it will have travelled to three countries!)

The best part of the trip was meeting the most amazing bulldog Bellush who roamed a bar in Montmartre where her owner was the bartender. Bellush was so sweet and kept coming up to us for a rub and then she crashed out in a chair. The bar got super busy and everyone kept going to sit in the chair and then realized it was already occupied.

This was my third time going to Paris and I have to say that, though I loved my time there, it is not a great as it was ten years ago. A man at Sacre Coeur who was trying to put his hand into my husband’s pockets pushed me. I pushed him away then he pushed me back and boy did I stare him down giving him the evil eye. I get crazy adrenaline in situations like that and I probably could lift a car or something so he’s lucky I didn’t go mental on his ass.

There were so many men selling cheap Eiffel Towers EVERY WHERE!  It made going to the actual Eiffel Tower a bit annoying as these guys approached us every two minutes. It was a nice trip, but I do think my love affair with Paris is over. Ce la vie.

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